


Femurs and Feelings

by JonesyBonesey



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Cunnilingus, F/F, F/M, Pregnancy, Shower Sex, Soul Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-25
Updated: 2017-06-18
Packaged: 2018-07-26 17:49:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7584076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JonesyBonesey/pseuds/JonesyBonesey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to Just the Bone Next Door! You and your skeleton sweetheart, Papyrus, set off on a lifelong journey together!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. *Spooktunes

The next three years of your life flew by. You and Papyrus were more than busy planning the perfect wedding. Every monster you knew wanted to help out or provide something in some way - it was a feat just to fit all of their contributions in somehow. Although you were very much grateful for it, you weren’t sure you’d be able to afford such a big event. As your preparations grew more and more extensive, your fame grew exponentially. This was partly due to Mettaton recording Papyrus’s proposal and a follow up interview a couple of months later. Your wedding plans were in every tabloid, every magazine, and every newspaper you could think of. You felt a little bad about it. After all, if this were anyone else, you were sure you’d be annoyed with all the round-the-clock coverage. 

The graduation ceremony was underway. Finally, _finally_ , you were handed your diploma. Your bachelor’s degree. The college was even footing the bill for you and all of your friends. In accordance that you advocate for them to get more students, of course. 

You hugged Papyrus with teary eyes as the ceremony ended and you all were free to mingle. He gently pressed his teeth to your lips and you giggled. He had a big kiss mark on his smile. 

“SO, THREE YEARS FLEW BY, DIDN’T IT SWEETIE?” He held your hand adorned with his ring and kissed it. “JUST FEW MORE DAYS NOW, THEN YOU AND I WILL BOTH GET TO EXPERIENCE WHAT A MONSTER WEDDING IS LIKE.” 

You giggled and kissed his forehead. Oh, you were more than ready to have the skeleton as your partner in crime forever. You both had everything perfectly planned. It would be in California on the beach you two visited before the interview, and the king would be officiating. All of your friends and family would be there to support you. And best of all, most confusingly of all, Sans was the one who sewed your dress. It was _gorgeous_. You asked how on earth he knew his way around a needle and thread so well. The small skeleton just shrugged and brushed it off. 

You two had long since moved in with each other, Cameron opting to stay with Sans in Papyrus’s old room. All of you were more than busy packing for the trip to California. Poor Papyrus was the most the most excited out of all of you. He couldn’t keep his hands off of you, not that you minded. At last the moment had arrived, on a Wednesday, for you and all your friends to board the plane and set off to have a monster wedding. It was a long and arduous four hour flight, but once you touched down you felt your excitement bounce back. 

Papyrus held your hand and squeezed it. One more week of preparation, then it was go time.

You all checked into a hotel and spent the days setting up on the beach, as well as introducing Papyrus to your parents. They were just pleased that meeting a skeleton pushed your studies along and that you were happy. That week didn’t even feel real. Suddenly you were wearing the dress Sans sewed and being fawned over by Cameron, Toriel, Frisk, and Mettaton himself. The five of you were in a large tent set up at the beach that had all sorts of mirrors and trappings inside. It hardly seemed like they were outdoors.

“Oh darling you look just stunning. Who knew that little bag of bones was so handy with needlework?” Mettaton adjusted your sleeves. They hung off of your shoulders and flowed down and waved like a boat sail in the wind. As the fabric got lower it faded into a teal color, eerily similar to your soul color. 

Toriel stared bemusedly at Mettaton before smoothing out your skirt. It was asymmetrically cut, with the back being way longer than the front. She pulled your veil over your face and smiled. 

“Oh my child, you look radiant. I might have to ask Sans to sew my wedding dress too.” She hugged you and giggled. Frisk hugged you too. They were a lot taller than when you first met them, almost as tall as Undyne.

They told you that they wanted to be the godparent of your skeleton babies with a sneaky sort of smile. Mettaton spat out the drink he was sipping while Toriel was laughing hysterically. You groaned and patted Frisk’s head. 

“Sure, why not. I’ll talk to Paps about it later. But Cameron already got first dibs.” You all laughed and held a serene sort of atmosphere as you talked. 

Meanwhile, Papyrus was panicking himself into a worried little puddle. To say he was nervous was an understatement. He could feel his soul thrumming in his rib cage. He tried to pick up a bottle of cold water to drink and calm down, but his hands were trembling so badly that Undyne had to snatch it away before it spilled on him. 

“Dude, what’s up with you? Just yesterday you were raring to go!! Where’s your fighting spirit!?” Her tuxedo had the sleeves torn off, but not from anything purposeful. She tried suplexing a boulder on the beach and flexed so hard that the sleeves just shredded themselves.

Papyrus sighed. “I JUST KEEP THINKING OF THINGS THAT COULD GO WRONG. I KNOW THIS IS A HAPPY OCCASION, BUT THIS IS A _MONSTER_ WEDDING, AFTER ALL, AND IN A VERY PUBLIC PLACE, TOO.” He looked down at his lap and sighed. “WHAT IF SOMEONE TRIED TO HURT US. OR HURT MY DARLING?” 

Sans pulled his brother’s bowtie into a neat little bow. It was a striking orange color, much like the orange on Papyrus’s soul. “that’s why we’ve got the royal guard on the lookout. and the attendance is really small.” 

Papyrus sighed. “I SUPPOSE YOU’RE RIGHT. THE GUARD IS MORE THAN ENOUGH TO KEEP EVERYONE SAFE.” He smiled up at the two. “THANKS FOR HELPING ME PUT ALL THIS TOGETHER BY THE WAY!” 

Undyne punched his shoulder. “No problem! That’s what best friends are for!” 

Sans clapped his hand on his brother’s shoulder. “don’t sweat it, pap. it’s all for you and your special little human, right?” 

Papyrus hugged them both. “NYEH HEH HEH!! EXACTLY!! AND MAYBE SOMEDAY WE’LL HAVE A HUMAN WEDDING, TOO. THAT MEANS MORE FREE CAKE AND PARTIES!! AND WE COULD JUST REUSE WHAT WE’VE DONE HERE!” 

Sans wiped an imaginary tear from his eye. “i’ve never heard you say anything so lazy in my life, pap. you make your big brother so proud.” 

Papyrus screeched indignantly and went out to the altar where Asgore was. The attendance was relatively small. All the monsters from Underground who could make it were there, along with your family and a few friends. He shuffled nervously a little, then stiffened, feeling Asgore’s huge hand land on his shoulder. 

“Don’t be nervous, Papyrus. Everything here will go smoothly, I promise you.” He smiled reassuringly at the skeleton who grinned right back. 

Soon, Mettaton, Frisk, and Toriel were standing along the edge of where you would be standing. Cameron was wearing a crown of golden flowers, imported all the way from Asgore’s garden Underground. That signified her as your Kindred Soul, or so Toriel explained. A Kindred Soul was kind of like the Best Man and Maid of Honor titles, except it was based more on soul bonds than friendship bonds. Sans was wearing a flower crown too, along with his suit and tie. 

Everyone started softly chattering in anticipation for the ceremony to start. Eventually both Frisk and Monster Kid were strutting down the aisle between the audience. The monster child was carefully picking up golden flower petals with their mouth and blowing them onto the sand. They were amazingly precise. Frisk was carrying the rings in one hand while helping Monster Kid throw petals with the other. The two stood next to Sans as Napstablook put a record onto their dj table. A sick bass beat thrummed, making the sand pulsate along with the vibrations. It was a pretty good remix of the wedding march. Other beach goers were watching idly at the odd ceremony. They couldn’t get too close, however, as all of the royal guard held a twenty foot perimeter around the ceremony. 

Papyrus watched and tapped his foot too the beat of the music. You were going to show up soon, and his soul was going wild. Sure enough, you emerged from the tent in the lovely dress with a bouquet of golden and echo flowers. Each of the flowers began playing the music that was pulsing from Napstablook’s speakers. You walked with your father down the aisle and stood across from Papyrus in front of Asgore. The rave music faded into a hum in the background. Asgore cleared his throat and smiled down at the two of you. 

“I’m happy you all could make it and witness this wonderful event.” You noticed out of the corner of your eye that Mettaton was with his camera crew and was recording the whole thing. Great, another televised event. Oh well, at least you looked gorgeous. “We’re all gathered on this lovely shore to celebrate together, in our own way, the union of our very own Papyrus and this lovely human.” 

The audience clapped and you heard a group “HOO-RAH!” from the dogs surrounding the ceremony. You lifted your hand to cover your giggle. 

Asgore chuckled and continued. “Before us all are not two halves of one whole soul, but two whole souls beating in tandem together. If anyone should disagree and say that you don’t think this is quite right, say something now. If not, I’ll just keep going.”

The audience was silent. Some monsters glanced at the onlooking humans. Others glared. 

“Excellent!” He continued. You tried your best to pay attention to what the king was saying, but it was hard. Especially with the way Papyrus was looking at you. You would have thought that you were made entirely of spaghetti with that expression on his face. Or maybe you were just holding a plate of spaghetti. The point was that he had the most love and adoration you had ever seen in those eye sockets of his. You tuned back into the ceremony, not wanting to fall too deeply into Papyrus’s gaze. You knew for a fact he wasn’t paying attention.

“... the vows. Would you two please summon your souls and exchange them?” Asgore smiled down at you two. 

You gently tapped Papyrus’s shoulder. 

“… WHAT?? IS IT OVER ALREADY???” He looked between you and Asgore. You could barely hold back your giggles at his cute expression. 

“No, Paps, just get your soul out, pretty please?” You looked up at him with a coy expression, and Papyrus was more than eager to comply. You two summoned forth your souls and exchanged them gently, not wanting to cause the other to jizz in their fancy clothes. 

The king held his hand over the souls. As he did so everyone bowed their heads in respect and closed their eyes. The king chuckled softly. 

 

“I’m going to be honest here, I’ve never done this with a human soul. I’m going to link you two to exchange any thoughts left unexpressed. Take as much time as you two lovebirds need.” The audience chuckled softly. 

You felt your consciousness melting in with Papyrus’s. You could hear him in your body - or was it your mind? He cooed and swooned about you with abandon, listing all the things he loved about you and all the ways he wanted to show you. He absolutely adored you. You could barely stem the stream of adoration coming from you either. You felt yourself praising him, loving him, wanting all of him to yourself, and he could hear it all. Your vision was swimming with white and teal, that white faded into a bright orange. It was warm and cozy. 

You felt awfully tired. 

You vaguely heard Asgore’s voice when suddenly you were being pulled away from that nice comfiness. Soon you were staring back at Papyrus again, and he had marmalade tears flowing out of his eye sockets. You felt his hand reach up and brush your cheek. Your face was wet with tears too, but you were both smiling. 

You both spoke at the same time. 

“Oh Papyrus, oh my gosh, I love you.” 

“I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, MY DARLING.” 

The audience and onlooker “aww-ed” while there was another rousing “HOO-RAH” from the perimeter-holding dogs and Undyne. 

Frisk stood beside Papyrus and held out the two rings to him. He gently slipped yours onto your finger, and you did the same for him. You never once broke eye contact. 

Asgore chuckled. “You many now- oh my.” 

You and Papyrus were three steps ahead of the king. He pulled your waist impossibly close to his and dipped you as low as his spine would allow while crashing his teeth into your mouth. Your lips were probably going to bruise later, but you didn’t care. You heard raucous cheering and “HOO-RAH”-ing and smiled. 

The sun was setting by the end of the ceremony. Sans had a laziness-inspired idea to wear bathing suits underneath all the wedding garb and have the reception at the beach. Everyone was more than happy to comply. You wore the skeleton bikini that Papyrus loved, while he wore his favorite red speedo. Everyone had a bit of a laugh at his style choices. You tossed your bouquet behind you before throwing your arms around the skeleton and dancing on the shore with him. You noticed Toriel and Sans dancing nearby with your bouquet in her arms and smiled. Napstablook played a slow kind of jam, a real spooky tune that was perfect for dancing to. Soon, the guard had dropped the perimeter, and the wedding reception turned into a beach party. There was enough wedding cake, pie, and burgers with a side of fries for everyone on the beach. 

As the moon rose, you and Papyrus sat at the shore. No one had gone home and the party was still raging on. The water that lapped at your legs felt nice and warm.  
“Hey Papyrus?”

Papyrus seemed to be deep in thought, because he jolted when you spoke. “YES, HONEY BUNCH?” 

You snorted a bit at the endearment. “I really do love you.” 

He nodded and held you close to his frame “I KNOW. I DO TOO. NOW HOW ABOUT SOME WEDDING PIE? OR PERHAPS WEDDING BURGERS? OR JUST GO THE CLASSIC ROUTE AND GET SOME CAKE?” He whispered to you. “MAYBE EVEN SOME WEDDING NOODLES. I MIGHT EVEN PREPARE THEM " _AL DENTE_ ".”

You stood and held his hand, laughing the whole time. There was no way on earth marriage was going to be the end of romance for you two.


	2. (NSFW)*Water is Wet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Papyrus have fun with water! ;)))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no excuses I wanted to write porn so here it is!!

The reception eventually died down and all the humans and visiting monsters left after congratulating you and Paps. You all cleaned up everything you could from the beach and headed back to the hotel. Everyone was completely tired out from the festivities. You laid on your back on the bed and groaned. You surely had a sunburn and your legs ached from dancing so much, but you were happy. And there seemed to be an extra bit of happiness that wasn’t there before. You felt Papyrus lay on top of you and wrap his arms around your body. 

“SO. HOW DID YOU ENJOY YOUR FIRST MONSTER WEDDING?” He beamed at you. 

You kissed his skull and sighed. “It was pretty alright, I guess. I met the most handsome skeleton there.” You slipped your hands under his shirt and up his spine. “We danced all night and I think he even kissed me.” You felt the giddiness in your heart spike a little.

“I WONDER WHO THAT COULD HAVE BEEN, SWEETIE. SURELY IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SOMEONE AT LEAST A FRACTION AS GREAT AS ME.” 

You both laughed and gazed at each other for a moment. “Do you feel it too? That connection thingy?” 

The skeleton nodded. “I DO. I FEARED IT WAS JUST ME FOR A WHILE.“

You kissed his cheekbone and giggled. “Oh okay, so we both have it! That would be absolutely embarrassing otherwise. You would know every little thing I was feeling!”

“NYEH HEH HEH!!” Papyrus nuzzled your cheeks. “LITTLE DO YOU KNOW, THE GREAT PAPYRUS ALREADY HAS THAT POWER!!”

You snickered a little. “Oh did you? Prove it, Paps.” 

Papyrus grinned smugly at you. “WELL I KNOW THAT WHEN YOU START CARESSING MY BONES, IT MEANS YOU’RE AROUSED. AND WHEN YOU START USING THOSE ADORABLE PET NAMES THEN YOU’RE FEELING VERY AFFECTIONATE.” He ran one of his hands through your hair, his voice was impossibly soft in your ear. “AND I FEEL VERY AROUSED AND AFFECTIONATE WHEN YOU DO THOSE THINGS TOO.” 

You smiled softly at Papyrus, he really did have a way to make your insides flutter. “Well now I’m really “aroused”. But you’re gonna have to wait until I get my shower.” You could have died laughing at Papyrus’s pouting. “Aw c’mon don’t be like that. No one said you couldn’t _come with me_ in the shower.” You winked and snickered at Papyrus’s shocked expression. 

“BETRAYAL!! HAS SANS GOTTEN TO YOU?? I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU SET ME UP FOR FOUR YEARS TO REVEAL THAT YOU TELL PUNS!!” He pretended to faint onto the bed and giggled. 

You hugged him and kissed all over his face. “I rate your performance 10 out of 10, drama queen. You might just give Mettaton a run for his money.” You stood and stretched a little. “You should get up and carry me while I shower so I don’t have to stand. Not that I’ll be able to stand afterwards anyway.” 

Papyrus looked up at you with a prideful look on his face. “OF COURSE NOT! I WOULDN’T HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY.” He sprung off of the bed and rushed to scoop you into his arms. You could feel the surge of personal pride he felt at being able to lift you, you decided to stroke his ego a bit. 

“Geez, Paps. You’re super strong. You just picked me up like it was nothing!” You giggled at his predictable reaction, his cheekbones flushed with pride. 

“O-OH YOU’RE WORTH MORE THAN NOTHING, AND THESE ARE THE STRONGEST BONES UNDERGROUND, YOU KNOW.” 

You wrapped your legs around his vertebrae and rested them on his pelvis. “I’m honored to be carried then.” 

The skeleton grinned and walked to the bathroom. It was absolutely huge. You silently thanked Mettaton. He reserved his private suite for you and Papyrus while Sans and Cameron stayed on an entirely different floor. That meant that you and Paps could make the absolute most of your wedding night, not that much would be done. You really were kind of tired, but different parts of you were vying for control of your actions at the moment.

Papyrus set you down on the marble sink countertop and turned on the shower water. 

“I WOULD ASSUME YOU’D LIKE A STEAMY SHOWER?” 

You snickered before you could stop yourself. Papyrus groaned theatrically. “WHY MUST OUR WEDDING DAY BE PLAGUED BY INCIDENTAL PUNS?!” 

You were still laughing as he began to undress you, gently grazing his fingertips over your waist and thighs. Those were some of his favorite parts, aside from your ass. He stripped and picked you back up. His bones were only barely uncomfortable pressing against your skin. You felt him leaned you against the warm shower wall and sighed. 

“You aren’t gonna slip and fall are you?” You eyed the wet bathtub floor warily. Last thing you needed was an injury from banging or even worse, Sans murdering you because Papyrus was injured while banging. 

Papyrus shook his head. “YOU’RE SO SWEET FOR WORRYING, BUT I’LL BE FINE. YOU CAN’T FEEL IT BUT THE FLOOR HAS KIND OF A WEIRD GRIPPY TEXTURE. I COULDN’T POSSIBLY FALL.” 

You nodded and held onto him loosely. “Well good, more than one part of me is dripping right now. I can’t get over how handsome you were in that suit.” You licked and bit at his cervical vertebrae. You could feel his bones shaking and something very familiar sliding between your thighs.

“YOU WERE GORGEOUS TOO.” He licked down your jawline. “I COULDN’T BELIEVE HOW LUCKY I WAS TO HAVE YOU AS MY LOVELY PARTNER.” He thrusted up in between your asscrack. “I WISH I COULD’VE TAKEN YOU THE MOMENT I SAW YOU WALK OUT OF THAT TENT.” 

You kissed his smile softly, Papyrus eagerly returned the sentiment slipping his tongue in your mouth. You gasped between your furious kissing. 

“P-Paps, you better stop teasin’ me.” You scratched at his ribs causing his breath to hitch. He moaned and growled in your ear. 

“AND JUST WHAT DO YOU THINK I’VE BEEN FEELING LIKE THIS WHOLE TIME, MY ADORABLE LITTLE HUMAN?” 

You shivered at his tone of voice. You could feel every bit of sexual frustration that was in his bones, just sitting and festering. 

You flashed him a mischievous smile. “I’m all yours, Paps, and I need you right now.” 

The skeleton wasted no time sliding his magic cock into you. You were wet from the foreplay and from the warm shower water, so he slipped right in. You both groaned at the sensation. You rested your head on his clavicle and and licked at his bones. Papyrus took the hint and began to thrust, but not nearly as roughly or quickly as usual. You looked at him confusedly. 

“Something wrong?” 

Papyrus shook his head and kissed your cheek. “NOT AT ALL, MY SWEET. I JUST WANT THIS TO LAST A LITTLE LONGER. AND MAYBE… MAYBE I WANT A LITTLE REVENGE FOR THE PUN.”

You balked at him for a moment as he continued his painstakingly slow thrusts. 

“Could you at least go a little deeper?” You looked up at him pleadingly. 

“I REQUIRE KISSES! A SHOWER OF THEM. AND MAYBE WE COULD TEACH THAT LITTLE MOUTH OF YOURS SOMETHING FAR MORE USEFUL THAN PUNS, RIGHT DARLING?” 

You nodded and grinned eagerly. “Of course Paps, anything you want!”

Papyrus nipped at your neck. “IT LOOKS LIKE WE HAVE A DEAL THEN. I CAN FEEL JUST HOW MUCH YOU NEED ME, YOU KNOW.” He began to thrust a bit faster. “OH WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE YOU.” He hugged you close to his frame. You could see his soul illuminating the room with a bright orange glow. 

You kissed all over his smile, your breathing hitching with every thrust as he went faster and faster. 

“I could a-ask the same th-thing, Paps. You’re too go-good to me.” 

You felt his soul pang with emotion. You were both so happy. Papyrus was past the point of holding any kind of control over his thrusts and soon he was plowing you into the shower walls. The best part of it all though, was the acoustics in the bathroom. It sounded like an orgy in the grand bathroom, but it was just you two, every noise was amplified and echoed across every surface. Just the sounds of your lovemaking was getting Papyrus off horribly. You could tell he was getting close to finishing the way he was groaning and biting you. The poor skeleton was trying to hold on as long as it took until you came too. 

“I-It’s okay, sweetie. You can go ahead and finish, I won’t mind.” 

Papyrus didn’t have to be told twice as he released inside of you. You were so close but you didn’t mind. Your boyf - _husband_ \- always found a way to make it up to you. Sure enough he gripped your ass and lifted your entire body upwards so that his face was perfectly in line with your crotch. You made a note to yourself to ask about his oral fixation as he furiously ate out your dripping cunt. Your entire body was shaking and making Papyrus wobble, as he was rather top heavy now. He leaned back a bit too far and you two were toppling backwards. You shot your hands out and stopped the fall, you could feel your arms trembling. 

Immediately you heard a panicked voice from behind you. “ARE YOU ALRIGHT?” 

You looked down to see Papyrus nearly fallen over, his face very securely between your thighs. Your hands and his feet were the only things keeping you two from toppling. You rolled your pussy onto his teeth. 

“I’m fine. I just need a little more Papyrus lovin’ then we can go sleep." 

You couldn’t hear his affirmation over your own squealing as Papyrus finished you off. You came and felt your hands slip from the wall. You briefly felt your stomach drop as you fell before a couple of blue bones caught you and slowed your fall. As soon as your momentum stopped, about a meter from the ground, you phased through the bones and onto the floor. A much less painful fall, but a bit of a rough experience anyways. You looked between your thighs, Papyrus was still there.

You scooted off of his face. His smile was absolutely covered in his own glowing cum and yours, seeping into a… 

_Oh Sans was going to kill you._

Between his smile and his nasal aperture was a long crack. _A crack in the bone. Good god you could have crushed his skull with your pussy._

You scrambled off of him, kissing all over his face and turning off the water. You stuttered out apologies. 

“Oh my gosh I’m so sorry! I knew I was too heavy for you, oh gosh I’m so sorry Paps!” You were on the verge of tears. 

Papyrus was quick to stand and pick you up, before soothing your panicked tears. 

“I’M FINE, HONEY BUNCH, DON’T WORRY ABOUT ME. LITTLE CRACKS HAPPEN SOMETIMES IT’S NOTHING TO CRY OVER.” He wiped your tears and chuckled. “THIS WILL BE A FUN ONE TO EXPLAIN TO SANS.” 

He carried you back to bed and and snuggled with you under the excessively thick and plush sheets. You felt like Sans was going to give you a bad time when he saw the state of Papyrus’s face the next morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now look what you've gone and done, naughty reader ;))))) It's alright though, Paps is a tough cookie. I don't think Sans is gonna take to kindly to this though.
> 
> Also just a PSA I need a beta reader for my smutty chapters! Message me on my tumblr if you're interested!


	3. *The Interview: The Squeakuel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans is just as mad as you expect him to be but, theres no time to be worrying about him! You've got an interview to do!

The next morning you awoke to a bed devoid of Papyrus. Instead, Cameron was sitting at the foot of the bed watching some show on the jumbo television on the wall. She glanced back at you and smiled. 

“Look who finally woke up! I’ve, like, never woken up before you. You were super tired yesterday, mate.” She flipped to a different channel.

You blinked confusedly at her. “Where’s Papyrus?” You looked around the room, the skeleton seemed to be nowhere around. You heard Cameron shift on the bed and flop backwards. 

“He and Sans went to get some breakfast.” She snickered. “You should’ve seen Sans’s face this morning, bro. What did you do to get that huge crack on your hus-bone’s face? I’ve never seen Sans so expressive in my life.”

You blushed at the memory. “He was uh, doing _things_ in the shower, with me. And I kind of fell on his face? With my, uh, you know?” You gestured towards your crotch. 

Her hysterical laughter filled the room. “Oh my god you’re not joking?? Holy shit that’s hilarious!!” She tried to stifle her laughing. “You know Sans is gonna like double kill you now, right?” 

You sighed and nodded, you were already dreading seeing Sans. You just _knew_ he was going to be livid when you saw him, you could only hope that Papyrus was faring alright. 

Meanwhile, waiting in line at a coffee shop, Sans and Papyrus were having the tensest of times. Sans was staring at the long crack connecting Papyrus’s nose to his mouth, luckily none of the teeth had cracked. He sighed. 

“why won’t you just tell me what your human did? i know you didn’t have that crack during the wedding.” 

Papyrus was blushing bright orange just thinking about it. In retrospect, he should’ve been more careful or at least removed his face from between your thighs. But he didn’t feel like it and now his beautiful visage and his dignity were paying the price. 

“IT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS THAT’S WHY.” He covered the crack with his hand and looked away. Did it really look that bad? Sans was surely making such a big deal about it. 

Sans grunted frustratedly and huffed. Did Papyrus not understand how jarring it was to see his little brother suddenly so obviously injured? It was as a shame, Sans was really starting to like you. Between the way his brother was acting and the depth of the crevice on Papyrus’s face, he was starting to assume the worst about you. He wasn’t going to let you hurt his brother any longer, that much he knew for certain. But first, he was going to find out what you did to hurt Papyrus. Even if he had to go straight to the source and show you a Bad Time™. Sans had no idea he was glowering until Papyrus tapped his shoulder and looked between him and the terrified cashiers. 

“SANS? ARE YOU ALRIGHT? ALL THE NICE PERSON WANTS IS YOUR ORDER.” He smiled apologetically at the fearful workers. “SORRY, HE ISN’T MUCH OF A MORNING PERSON AND YESTERDAY WAS VERY BUSY.” He smiled at one of the baristas. “YOU WERE AT MY WEDDING BEACH PARTY YESTERDAY, RIGHT?”

The barista stared back and smiled in relief. “Y-Yeah. That was a real kickin’ party. It was cool.” 

Just like that Papyrus dissolved the tension in the room and ordered their drinks. They even threw in a free cookie! 

The two skeletons walked back to the hotel and entered Mettaton’s penthouse suite. 

“I’M HOME, DARLING!!” Papyrus placed the drinks in a fully stocked kitchen then rushed over to hug you. You hugged him back and kissed all over his face. 

Sans was seething. You hurt his brother and then had the _gall_ to act all lovey with him? That was stepping over the line. 

“so tell me, pap’s human. how in the hell did he get that crack?” 

Papyrus sighed exasperatedly. “DON’T MIND HIM SWEETHEART, HE’S JUST A LITTLE ON EDGE THIS MORNING.” He was blushing again.

You looked between the brothers. Were they… fighting? You were a little flattered that Papyrus loved you just as much as he loved his brother if not more. You kissed Papyrus’s cheekbone and sighed. 

“I gotta tell him, Paps.”

Your husband groaned and covered his face with a pillow. “BUT IT’S EMBARRASSING!! DON’T TELL SANS!!”

You giggled and kissed the back of his skull. “I’m still telling. It isn’t that big of a deal, you know. Not nearly something for him to be so angry about.” 

You smiled nervously at Sans. “Promise not to get mad?” 

Sans was silent and staring bemusedly at you. 

“Right… So basically what happened was, uh,” You blushed and looked away. “Papyrus was, uh, his head was in a certain place, in the shower but then we fell. A-And I, um,” You hurriedly spat out the rest of the sentence, “accidentallybustedhisskullwithmypussy.”

Sans stared for a moment then started laughing as relief washed over his body. “oh thank the stars. i thought you were some sort of rotten person and you hit him on purpose.”

You stared back at Sans. Was that what he thought of you? Four years of being utterly devoted to his brother, with only one or two big fights in between, and he still thought you were tricking Papyrus somehow? Sans sighed happily as his laughter died down. 

“guess that serves me right for not trusting you. out of all the humans i’ve ever met, you’re at least the one of the most… friendly… to monsters.” He chuckled a little. “you know they say to practice safe sex for a reason, pap.”

Papyrus groaned. “NOOOO. NOW HE KNOWS AND HE’LL NEVER LET ME LIVE THIS DOWN.” 

Sans was grinning maniacally. “damn right I’m not. only you could injure yourself doing that. you can’t make up humor this good.” He looked down bashfully, blushing an interesting blue. “sorry for not trusting you, pap’s human. you understand right? i gotta look out for the world’s best bro.”

You nodded and briefly hugged him. Both Papyrus and Cameron aww’ed at you both.

“Now that that’s over.” You hugged Papyrus and kissed his still glowing cheekbones. “Come on, let me see your smile please? I didn’t get to see it first thing, you know. I missed you this morning.” 

The skeleton turned over and pulled you into a warm embrace. “NYEH HEH HEH!! REVENGE PART TWO!! THE REVENGENING!! YOU’RE TRAPPED IN MY ARMS FOR TELLING EMBARRASSING STORIES ABOUT ME TO SANS.” You giggled as he kissed all over your face. 

“No!! I’ve been tricked!! How will I go on!!” You ran your hands over his ribs trying to distract him so you could break free. 

“AH AH. NONE OF THAT THIS MORNING.” He gently grabbed your hands and held them. “I GOT YOUR FAVORITE COFFEE AND I DON’T WANT IT GETTING COLD.”

You all sat in the kitchen, the tension all but vanished, and relaxed. You had a few more hours until another interview with Mettaton. It was your way of paying him back for all he had provided to set up the wedding. You put on your favorite shorts and shirt as Papyrus did the same as the time drew closer to the interview. 

“WILL YOU BE JOINING US FOR THIS INTERVIEW, SANS?” Papyrus asked as Sans sat on their bed and texted. 

“nah, i think i might sit out on this one.” He winked at both of you. “you know i tend to crack under the spotlight.” He snickered.

Papyrus groaned and slipped on his sandals. “SANS, WHY MUST YOU TORTURE ME SO?” 

Cameron had already told you that she was taking time to hang with Mark and Napstablook at the beach, so you knew she wouldn’t be coming along. 

You held Papyrus’s hand and stood. “Ready to go Paps? We don’t want to keep Mettaton waiting.” 

Papyrus chuckled and kissed your forehead. “NYEH HEH HEH!! OF COURSE!! THE CAMERA CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF US!” 

You both left for Mettaton’s new studio. It was bigger and flashier than ever, due to the crazy amount of revenue he made with your interview and the subsequent sponsorships. Not to mention his restaurant chain, fashion line, and interior designing team. Upon arriving you two were ushered into his dressing room where several attendants were applying powder to his metal face. 

“Oh darlings! It’s been far too long!” He wrapped his robotic arms around you both and kissed your cheeks. “Your wedding was a hit!” 

You both thanked him earnestly, but Mettaton quickly stopped you. 

“Think nothing of it! If fact, I have another gift for you all. Free of charge even!” He looked between the two of you and squinted at Papyrus’s facial crack. “But first explain to me what you could have possibly done to mar your face in the past 24 hours.” 

Papyrus was silent for a moment then smiled. 

“WHY I WAS DOING MY DARLING OF COURSE!” He wrapped an arm around your waist. 

The smug look on Mettaton’s face was almost as bad as Sans’s cheeky expressions. 

“Oh you two are naughty~!” He laughed a tittering little laugh. “Would you like my makeup team to fix it up for the cameras?”

Papyrus nodded feverently. “YES PLEASE.”  
Mettaton clapped his hands and a swarm of stylists surrounded Papyrus. You sat on a fluffy pink couch and waited. By the time the stylists had backed away from Papyrus, you couldn’t even tell that a crack was there. Mettaton stood and gave his best grin. 

“Stare in awe at the power of my MTT Brand Face Reconstructing Cream! I originally sold this stuff Underground back when I was more… rectangular. So that others could taste at least a little bit of what my fabulousness was like. Now humans can use it to improve the facial features to look more like me!” 

You looked more than a little impressed as Papyrus inspected his face in a gigantic mirror. “WOWIE!! IT’S LIKE YOU NEVER FELL ON ME!!” He gently prodded at the substance. 

Mettaton gently patted his hands away. “No touching until it’s dried! You wouldn’t want an uneven coat! Besides it’s showtime!”

Mettaton checked himself in the mirror and grinned before heading out to the stage, you and Papyrus followed suit. 

You three sat in the darkness on stage briefly before spotlights shone all around the stage and smoke poured in from the floor. “Welcome beauties and gentlebeauties to MTT Live!! And thank you for tuning in to our super special interview starring these cute little newlyweds!!” 

The audience applauded, you could feel Papyrus’s pride tickling in your chest as he waved back at them. 

Mettaton held up his hand and the crowd fell silent. “Excellent! So how are you two doing today?”

You held Papyrus’s hand and took a deep breath. He looked at you and you nodded, you’d try your hand at answering questions too this time. 

“Oh we’ve been fine, super tired after that reception, but fine.” You smiled at the memory. 

Papyrus nodded. “YES!! WE’RE BOTH VERY HAPPY, ALBEIT ALSO VERY TIRED. I THINK MY DARLING REALLY ENJOYED THE MONSTER WEDDING.”

You kissed his cheekbone and giggled. “Yeah, it was pretty great.”

The audience aww-ed at your little exchange, Mettaton included. He squealed and clapped. “Oh, you two are just so sweet!!” He chuckled a bit. “So what’s next for you two? I heard you graduated from college, yes?”

The audience applauded.  
“YES!” Papyrus responded eagerly. “BUT FOR MY DARLING AT LEAST, SCHOOLING ISN’T FINISHED QUITE YET. THERE’S STILL, HOW MANY WAS IT?”

You smiled at him “Eight.” 

“EIGHT MORE YEARS OF ALL SORTS OF DOCTOR-Y TYPE SCHOOLING TO GO THROUGH.” 

Mettaton looked thoughtful for a moment. “Oh my, you’ve got a busy life ahead of you, huh? I’m sure you’ll do fine if you’ve made it this far! You’ll make a fine human doctor!” The robot looked to Papyrus. “What about you Papy dearest? Any big future plans?” 

Papyrus nodded excitedly. “I plan to open a restaurant, eventually! An Italian food restaurant, to be exact!” 

You noticed Mettaton smirk, there was a certain gleam in his mechanical eye. “Italian did you say? How exotic!” “He fixed his expression after a mere second. “So what are you two doing for your honeymoon?”

Papyrus stared blankly at the robot. “WHAT’S THAT?”

You shook your head. “I don’t really know how those work or how they’re spaced out between all the hecticness of the wedding. I don’t really have the funds for a honeymoon anyways.”

Papyrus looked worriedly at you. “BUT WHAT IS IT THOUGH? AND WHY DON’T WE HAVE THE FUNDS FOR IT?” He hated that he couldn’t provide for you like he wanted, but he was sure his successful restaurant would help with that. 

Mettaton chuckled at the couple. “It’s a trip humans take after their weddings, Papy dear, nothing to worry about. Mettaton has already taken care of it! All for the low low price of letting me be the first to see your little children when you decide to have them. I want primetime coverage of the little angels!” 

You and Papyrus both blushed. The skeleton cleared his throat, you laughed at that a little. 

“SURE! YOU’RE OUR FRIEND AFTER ALL!” 

Mettaton held both your hands. “Perfect! Then prepare for a two-week-long honeymoon in Italy! A human nation known for history, art, and…” He smirked at looked back at an awestruck Papyrus. “...being the home of spaghetti.” 

You felt Papyrus’s excitement spike exponentially and clutched at your chest softly. You wondered briefly if that was what heart palpitations felt like. 

“WOWIE!! OH THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU, METTATON!!!” He hugged the robot tightly and looked back at you with the most adorable happy expression you’d ever seen on him. “THIS IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN!!” 

If he had a tail, it would be wagging at Mach 20 for sure. You giggled at the image. 

“Don’t hug him too hard, Paps. He might dent.” 

Your husband released Mettaton and grinned. “SORRY. THANK YOU SO MUCH METTATON!! I CAN’T WAIT TO DRINK HONEY WHILE GAZING AT THE MOON. THAT’S THE MAIN EVENT RIGHT??!” 

You snickered and kissed his cheek. “We can drink honey if you want to, Paps.” 

Papyrus settled down and you two continued to answer Mettaton’s questions. He asked about challenges you two would face, how your human family was supporting you, and the future of monsterkind in relation to humans. You answered as best as you could. Though you tried to stay realistic, you were a little optimistic. You hoped and wished that the anti-monster sentiment would fade at least to a murmur. 

Eventually, Mettaton was reciting his usual closing statement and the show went off the air. You and Papyrus both hugged the life out of the robot. Thanking him so much for his generous gift. Mettaton laughed and hugged you both back. 

“Think nothing of it! It’s only the beginning if you keep your word about be getting exclusive coverage and information about your future little stars!” Mettaton patted your head. “I hope you two have fun in Italy, I’ve never been. Life as a star is pretty busy, you know.” He glanced at his wristwatch. “Oh heavens, speaking of which!! I have to go! Ta ta you two! Don’t have too much fun in Europe!” He dashed off leaving you and Papyrus to chatter excitedly about your upcoming summer honeymoon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters are gonna be slow coming, even slower than now shockingly, because class is back in session and I am not happy about it.


	4. (NSFW) *Was it a really a honeymoon? My eyes didn't turn into pizza pies or anything.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You finally get to go on your honeymoon with your adorable hus _bone_!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HA! I thought I could wait until fall break to update this. What a fool I was.

You and Papyrus spent the next week planning on what to do while in Italy. After a few more conversations with Mettaton, you learned that you would be staying in Venice, Italy. You vaguely remembered hearing about it in your European history class in high school. You remembered Papyrus’s excited expression when you told him about it.

“YOU MEAN EVERYONE WORKS AS A RIVER PERSON??? THERE MUST BE SOME SORT OF CLOAK STORE THERE THEN. A FANCY EXOTIC ONE OF COURSE!!” 

You had a good laugh at that. Life in the underground always seemed more and more... interesting every time Papyrus talked about it. Finally, the day of your departure arrived; Sans and Cameron stood and hugged you both at the gate. The smaller skeleton flashed you a smug grin. 

“I know you put your soul into loving by cool bro but try to bring him back in one piece. Wouldn’t want him to crack under all that affection you’re giving him.” He snickered as Papyrus groaned. 

“SANS PLEASE!!!” Papyrus held your hand, “LET’S GO BEFORE I’M ASSAULTED WITH MORE HORRIBLE WORDPLAY.”

You nodded and took your seats on the plane; both of your souls were stirring with excitement. 

“So what do you want to do first, Paps?” You scrolled through a website detailing the area you’d be staying at. Apparently, it would be really high end, the penthouse suite that Mettaton got for you alone was worth more than both of your apartments. You felt Papyrus lean closer to you.

“WOWIE! IS THAT WHERE WE’RE STAYING??? I’LL HAVE TO MAKE SOMETHING FOR METTATON IN THANKS, LATER.” 

You nodded. “Oh just wait till you see which room he got us. It’s got like, its own balcony and everything. And it’s near a super ritzy restaurant, too.” 

You felt your chest tighten as Papyrus’s excitement spiked, he placed one of his bony hands on top of yours. “I WOULD HAVE NEVER IMAGINED I WOULD GET TO GO TO SUCH A RAD, NEW PLACE! I’M HAPPY I GET TO GO WITH YOU!” He smiled that little grin that always stole your heart. 

The entire cabin ‘aww-ed’ at the mushy display and Papyrus blushed in response then pulled you against his frame. You two spent the rest of the plane ride in that position. A wayward fan would ask for an autograph or a picture, but other than that the trip was smooth. After landing, you both wandered around the airport a bit, not understanding any of the signs or voices around you. It dawned on you that learning a little Italian before getting there would have helped. Suddenly, Papyrus’s hand was grabbed by something. Both of your souls twinged in surprise. 

“Ciao! You are the skeleton and human, yes?” The man was small compared to Papyrus. His voice was heavily accented and he held a sign with both of your names on it. “I will take you to your hotel.” 

You both followed him to a taxicab, then into a gondola, then finally to the massive front doors of your hotel. The man handed you two an envelope then smiled and bowed. 

“I wish you two a good stay in Venice.” With that he left, forcing you two to check in by yourselves. You carried your baggage to the front desk with Papyrus. Upon seeing you, the receptionist’s face practically glowed, he began barking orders to other employees and smiled at you. Soon your bags were being taken and a woman in a sharp suit was kissing your cheeks. Papyrus didn’t look too pleased by that and you couldn’t help but giggle at his pouting. 

You didn’t know about all Italians, but these hotel guys were sure as hell touchy. You both were rushed to your room, all of your bags were placed inside already. The woman in the suit (who you assumed to be the manager of the hotel) said something you didn’t understand and waved before shutting the door. 

You both stood in silence for a moment before bursting into laughter. 

“Oh, oh my god, what the hell even was that?” You sat on a sofa and tried to stifle your giggles. Papyrus sat beside you and wiped a tear from his eye socket, you could hear him trying to hold in his little ‘nyeh hehs’. 

“WELL I’D SAY DAY ONE HAS BEEN ENJOYABLE SO FAR!” He sighed happily and pressed his teeth against your lips. “MWAH!! THE FIRST KISS OF THE ‘HONEYMOON’ HAS BEEN GIVEN BY THE GREAT PAPYRUS!” 

You pretended to faint on the couch. “Oh, whatever shall I do now?” You held out the envelope the man from the airport gave you. “I’m far too in love to muster the strength to open this letter! This is the end of me!” 

Papyrus scooped you into his arms and smothered your face with kisses. “NOT TODAY! MY HUSBANDLY SKILLS SHALL REVITALIZE YOU!!” 

You opened the envelope to find to debit cards and a letter from Mettaton. 

_Dear Papy and his darling human,_

_Sorry to share this news with you on such short notice but you two have no international currency! That was a lapse in planning on my part, so I enclosed two prepaid cards for you both! They use “European” money, so you two should be fine! I also put in a good word for you at the restaurant up the street! You can’t miss it, it has the sandwich board outside with a heart and crossbones! Tell them that Mettaton sent you and you’ll have dinner on me! I picked out some venue appropriate attire for you both, I’m sure you’ll love what I picked out! The clothes are hanging in the closet for your, accessories and all! ;) Be sure to take lots of pictures for me, darlings~! And make some juicy stories for me!_

_Your favorite superstar robot,  
Mettaton  <3 _

You both looked out of the window, it was already nearly nighttime. 

“How about we fancy up and check out this restaurant, Pap?” 

Papyrus rubbed the grooves his knuckles and smiled apologetically at you. “I’M KIND OF EXHAUSTED, SUGAR. CAN WE DO IT TOMORROW FOR LUNCH? WE DO HAVE TWO WEEKS AFTER ALL!”

You nodded and traced his zygomatic with your finger. “Anything you want, Paps. I’m kind of ready to hit the hay too.” 

He carried you to the massive bedroom. A chandelier hung above your bed, there was an ornate wardrobe on the far wall and to the left of the bed, there was a balcony. You stared at the door to the balcony then back at Papyrus.

“I want to stand out the balcony.” 

Papyrus was more than happy to oblige and gently put you down. You strode over to the balcony and leaned against the stone railing. The view was breathtaking, you could see the lights from the buildings shimmering against the water below. You took a deep breath and smiled. 

_‘This is a really fucking nice place.’_ You wondered how in the hell you were ever gonna repay Mettaton for this. The experience you were getting itself was worth its weight in gold, let alone the price of all this. You were more than prepared to accept your fate as a college graduate with no money and forego a honeymoon when suddenly the robot surprises you with all of this. You felt a little nauseous at the thought of how long it would take to pay all of this back. 

You felt Papyrus hug you from behind. “IS SOMETHING THE MATTER? YOUR SOUL FELT UNWELL… WOULD YOU LIKE TO TALK ABOUT IT?” 

Oh right, the soul connection was still a thing. 

You sighed and leaned back into him, shaking your head. “It’s nothing. I just can’t believe I’m in a whole ‘nother country. Never thought I’d ever be able to do that, especially not with such a handsome skeleton on my arm.” You smirked and kissed his smile softly. Papyrus retaliated just as softly, prodding at your lips with his tongue. In a matter of seconds, you both were heatedly kissing and grabbing at each other. It took all of your willpower to pull away and not give in to Papyrus’s whining once you did. 

“I thought you were exhausted, sugar bones? Don’t tell me you were just kidding.” You smirked. 

“I AM ABSOLUTELY EXHAUSTED, BUT THAT NEVER MEANS I’M TOO TIRED TO COMFORT YOU. NOW ARE YOU READY TO REALLY TELL ME WHAT’S THE MATTER?” 

You winced. As fun as this soul connection was, you hated being read like an open book. 

“Fine. I just, I don’t know how I’m gonna repay Mettaton for all of this, you know? It’s all just so _much_. I don’t even think working for thirty years would pay this off.” You walked back inside and flopped onto your bed. 

Papyrus followed you and rubbed your back. “METTATON SAID IT WOULD BE FINE AS LONG AS HE GOT TO SEE OUR NEWBORN CHILDREN, RIGHT?” 

You groaned. “Yeah but, like, I don’t even know if we can have children, or how exactly that would work. What happens if we can’t? I would hate to let Mettaton down after he did all this for us... ” You buried your face into a pillow. 

Papyrus stroked your hair and smiled. “YOU’RE RIGHT. ALTHOUGH I AM KNOWLEDGEABLE ON MANY THINGS, I HAVE NO IDEA WHETHER A CHILD OF OURS WOULD DEVELOP PROPERLY OR EVEN LIVE.” He felt your soul pulse with fear. “BUT I DON’T BELIEVE FOR A SECOND THAT METTATON WOULD HOLD US ACCOUNTABLE FOR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. IT’S NOT LIKE WE CAN CONTROL IT.”

You turned your head and threw Papyrus a sniffly grin. You had barely started crying, not because you were sad, but because Papyrus knew just what to say to relieve some of your worries. 

“Come here you!” You pulled him into a hug. “Thanks for saying all that, you’re way too good to me sometimes.” 

Papyrus rubbed your back and was flushed with pride. “WELL, IT’S MY JOB TO KNOW HOW TO COMFORT YOU!” 

You chuckled and gently ran your fingers across his cervical vertebrae. “Can we do the soul sex thing? Pretty please?”

Papyrus blushed and stared at you. “OF COURSE, MY SWEETHEART! BUT, UM, DO YOU MIND IF I ASK WHY?”

You felt your cheeks heat up with embarrassment. “I don’t know. You just said something super sweet and now I really want to be close. Closer than normal sex, you know?”

The tall skeleton nodded and summoned forth his soul. You grinned at the familiar orange glow and began stripping ever so slowly. You weren’t planning on ruining another one of your outfits with soul goop, so you figured you’d put on a little show while preserving your clothes. Once you were fully nude you glanced up at Papyrus who was more than entranced by you. 

“WOWIE.” You heard him whisper faintly.

You blushed and called forth your own soul. “You’ve seen me naked at least like, a thousand times.” 

Papyrus hastily removed his clothes and kissed you fiercely, wasting no time in pulling you on top of him and conjuring his cock. 

He spoke in gasps between kissing you. “IT’S STRANGE REALLY. EVERY TIME I SEE YOUR LOVELY BODY IS LIKE THE FIRST TIME ALL OVER AGAIN. IT DRIVES ME WILD.” 

You whined and ground your needy cunt into his lap, making him groan and clutch your ass like a lifeline. 

“ _Papyrus, please._ I might explode if you keep being so sweet.” You pressed your chest as close as possible to his ribcage causing your souls to rub against each other. Both of you moaned at the sudden stimulus. 

Papyrus easily slipped his pulsing dick inside of you and nipped at your neck. He whispered sweet nothings in your ear and held you as close as he could while thrusting roughly into you. You had to admit, all of this TLC during sex was making you feel a little hazy, entirely too hazy. Borderline orgasm hazy. Before you could warn him, however, you felt something like vertigo, then all of the pleasure you felt was heightened exponentially. You felt him shudder and increase his pace beneath you. You glanced down at your souls and felt your breath hitch. 

_Oh god, they were fused together._

Orange and teal dripping into Papyrus’s rib cage and onto the sheets. No wonder you felt like you were being fucked all the way to cloud nine. You rasped and held Papyrus’s face between your hands. 

“P-Paps _look_.” You groaned as he looked up at you blearily, “Our souls are together.” He tilted his head and gasped sharply. 

“O-OH..H MY! ARE SOULS MEANT TO DO THAT?” He looked up at you worriedly. 

You kissed his cheek. “It feels _fan-fucking-tastic_ so I would think so- _oh Papyrus!_ ” 

The sight of your souls fused and pulsating like that sent Papyrus into a frenzy. He could feel all of the love you two felt magnified by a million and he couldn’t get enough. The hot closeness of your souls and your bodies was practically shoving him over the edge of pleasure. Before he could even warn you he was spilling himself inside of you all the while moaning your name like it was sacred. Feeling his pleasure spike through your fused souls caused you to cum hard, soul goop was all over your torsos and the bed. You collapsed onto him and felt his hands release your butt to cover his face. You looked to see his skull glowing orange. 

“I-I, AH, I DIDN’T MEAN TO FINISH SO QUICKLY BUT… WOWIE. THAT WAS… SOMETHING.” He gazed and grinned up at you.

You kissed his forehead and caught your breath. “Oh my gosh, is the great Papyrus out of adjectives? I never thought I’d see the day you’d use such a vague description.” You teased him and rested your head on his clavicle. 

You felt Papyrus chuckle and trap you in an embrace. “WELL, CONGRATULATIONS ON MAKING ME ORGASM SO INTENSELY THAT I LOST MY ENTIRE VOCABULARY. WHICH IS EQUALLY AS EXTENSIVE AND GREAT AS ME.” 

There it was. You chuckled and kissed his mandible. “If it’s all the same to you I’m tired as hell. I say we actually sleep now so we can actually have lunch at lunch time.”

Papyrus nodded and kissed you one last time before slowly drifting to sleep.

You counted day one of the honeymoon as a complete success.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reunited and it feels so good! It's glad to be back in the writing game, and what better way to make a comeback is there other than porn am I right?? Idk when I'll upload the next chapter, but it sure as hell won't be a two-month wait! Not with what I've got planned for this story anyways.
> 
> I'm entirely open to suggestions and stuff for what they do next in this fair Italian city!


	5. *Rock the Boat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Italy exploring time, but something goes awry, as things are wont to do in your life.

You woke trapped in a tangle of bony limbs and smiled. The room was a dark blue; it was probably really early. Papyrus’s soft snores were the only sound in the room. You attempted to free yourself from his ever so strong grasp, but it was damn near impossible. You opted instead to watch the sunrise from your balcony window. The orange hues of the morning danced against the chandelier hanging above your bed, casting rainbows all over the room. It was a breathtaking moment, at least until your leg fell asleep. 

You wiggled one of your arms free after a few more minutes and sighed. You were gonna be stuck all day at this rate. You gently tapped Papyrus’s skull. 

“Hey, I’m stuck and I gotta pee. Can you let me up, please?” 

His breathing stuttered and Papyrus _finally_ woke up. He hummed blearily and squinted at the sunlight. 

“OF COURSE, SWEETHEART.” He shifted and you quickly scrambled off of the bed. “ALSO, GOOD MORNING!” He trapped you in a hug before you had a chance to even leave the vicinity of the bed. 

You groaned, but only half-heartedly, it wasn’t like it was easy to deny his affections. “Good morning to you too Paps. Now can I go pee? Please?” You heard your husband chuckle and you were graciously released. 

“IS IT ALRIGHT IF WE SHOWER TOGETHER THIS MORNING?” He looked to you hopefully. 

You spoke from inside the bathroom. “Yeah sure, get in here!”

The bathroom was cozy. On the wall furthest from the door, there was a shower and in the corner was a very expensive looking bathtub. Above it was a window overlooking the city and sheer draperies giving the room a regal flair. The sink was a glimmering gold surrounded by marble countertops and a _giant_ mirror.

Papyrus entered and hugged you while you were washing your hands. 

“NYEH! I HAVE CAPTURED YOU ONCE AGAIN, HUMAN!” You felt him nuzzle the back of your neck. 

“That you did, Pap. You captured my heart a while ago, though.” You turned and kissed his forehead. “You mind if we change the shower to the bath? That thing looks so fancy and I wanna sit in it.” 

“OF COURSE! THE METHOD OF BATHING DOES NOT MATTER! WE JUST HAVE TO BE TOGETHER!” 

You felt your soul twinge. _‘What a goober.’_

“Good! Because I wasn’t taking no for an answer! I was gonna have to use my super secret persuasion method on you.” You turned away from Papyrus, but he could just hear the face splitting grin on your face. 

Eventually, the tub was filled with warm water and some fancy bath oils that you’d found under the sink. You and Papyrus sat together in the tub; you leaned against him and sighed. 

“So this is how the other half lives? I can say I’ll miss the big bathtubs when this is all over at least.” 

Papyrus was massaging your shoulders as he spoke. “I TOO WILL MISS THIS. I VERY MUCH LIKE BEING ABLE TO SIT DOWN AND BATHE WITH YOU. IT IS VERY REJUVENATING WITH ALL THE GOOD SMELLING STUFF YOU PUT IN.” 

You looked down at the bathwater, orange and teal began mixing into the water. You hadn’t even noticed the dried soul goo on your chest. “Oh ew look. Now the waters all tainted.” 

Papyrus grimaced and looked at the water in front of you. “AT LEAST WE KNOW THAT IT ISN’T TOXIC OR SOMETHING. DO I HAVE SOME ON ME TOO?” You turned your body toward him. 

“Yeah,” you snickered, “your ribs are pretty covered.” You drizzled some water over his ribs attempting to rinse the stuff off. “You think our souls need to be washed too?”

Papyrus held his chin for a moment, puzzling over the answer. “PROBABLY NOT, BUT IT WOULDN’T HURT TO CHECK. WOULD YOU LIKE FOR ME TO DO YOU FIRST?” 

You snorted. “I think you have the doing me department covered.”

Papyrus blushed. He knew it was silly that he was considering how much you two made love, but he still felt shy about your intimate jokes. “YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT!” 

You chuckled softly and summoned your soul. “I know, Pap. I’m just messin’ with you. Have at it, babe.” 

He examined your soul carefully, Rinsing water all over it. He squinted and kept dipping it in and out of the water. You felt his grip tighten ever so slightly and felt his frustration. 

“Everything okay?” 

He nodded absently. “YES EVERYTHING IS INDEED FINE. THERE’S A LITTLE WHITE SPOT I CAN’T SEEM TO GET OUT.” He dunked the thing in the water and pulled it out again. “I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS COMING OUT, MY SWEETHEART. SHOULD WE CALL A DOCTOR???” He gave your soul back and you examined it. 

Yeah, he was right, a white splotch on the left side of your soul marred its perfect teal surface. “I’m sure it’s fine. I mean, you saw what happened last night, right? Our souls were like inside of each other or something. I think this is just our soul bond, maybe?” You didn’t really believe yourself but it was the only guess you had. “Lemme check yours.” 

Papyrus acquiesced and handed you his soul. It was a pastel orange, no hints of blue-green or teal anywhere. You felt Papyrus’s worry increase tenfold. “MINE IS PERFECTLY CLEAN. WHAT DO WE DO???”

You smoothed your thumb over his cheekbones and smiled. “ _We_ aren’t going to do anything because this is our honeymoon and I’m perfectly fine. If things seem to exacerbate, then we’ll call Alphys or something. This is probably just a side effect from having some intense human on monster soul sex.” You wagged your eyebrows playfully. 

Papyrus giggled behind his hand. “YOU’RE RIGHT. LET’S HAVE AN AMAZING DAY TWO OF OUR ROMANTIC GETAWAY!” 

You nodded and leaned back into his chest. You spent another hour like this until the bath water began to run cold and you were starting to look pruney. Papyrus always hated when your skin started to do that. You two got dressed and sat back onto the bed. 

“Where should we go today?” You hemmed and hawed, mulling over things that Mettaton mentioned when suddenly you snapped your fingers. “Gondolas! Duh! Didn’t you want to ride on one? We can, like, go out to eat afterward!” 

Papyrus held your hands excitedly. “WHAT AN EXCELLENT IDEA! WHERE SHALL WE HAIL ONE?” 

You took out your phone and searched for ports or something that were nearby. “Oh, there’s a place nearby that like has some docked. Like, super nearby.” 

“HOW SERENDIPITOUS!” He stood and held your hand. “LET’S GO!!!” 

The streets were just as stunning as they were from your balcony. Many of the city residents gawked at your husband, some even throwing hateful or disgusted looked at you both, but you were far too focused on following the map on your phone to care. You were jolted out of your extreme navigating concentration by a screech. 

“HEY PUNKS!!! Need a totally romantic boat ride!?!” 

You both whipped your heads around to see Undyne standing in a hot pink gondola with a giant, rhinestoned “M” on the side. There was also, somehow, a grand piano in the gondola. Undyne yelled again.

“Get over here you love nerds!!!” 

You both walked over to the gaudy boat, well more like you walked while Papyrus sprinted and bear hugged his friend. 

“UNDYNE!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? AND WHY ARE YOU ON A GONDOLA???” 

She sat in the boat and grinned proudly. “Mettaton said that if I helped with this he’d help me move to California where Alphys is!!! So I’m gonna give you two dorks the best damn gondola ride of your life!”

You couldn’t help but feel nervous about her fiercely determined expression, but what could you do?

You both boarded the boat and began your smooth trek down the waterways. Surprisingly, Undyne wasn’t being her usual loud and terrifying self. She paddled the boat to just the right speed then after letting it coast on its own began to play on the piano. She was quite good. You and Papyrus sat and sipped the complimentary wine in the boat. It tasted rich and smooth, even Papyrus liked it. Your chest tightened with emotion as you felt the waves of adoration rolling off of Papyrus. He scooted into your lap and kissed you sweetly. You two rode like this for what seemed like forever. Of course, however, your dreamlike ride was brought to a close as Undyne pulled into another port. 

“This is where you two get off!” She helped you off of the boat. 

You looked around to get your bearings. You had no idea where you were, but you were nowhere near the hotel. You were near some sort of restaurant, a real high end looking place, some clothing stores, a grocery store, and a bridge. You could make do with finding a way back to the hotel. You nodded and hugged Undyne. “That was actually super relaxing. Thanks, Undyne.” 

Undyne laughed heartily. “Of course it was! What did you expect?” 

You both laughed for a bit then waved goodbye as you and Papyrus explored the square you were at. Papyrus marveled at every little thing, regardless of whether it was something to be impressed by or not. He suggested you two ate at the restaurant you were dropped off near. When you two stepped in the restaurant fell silent. All the patrons and servers alike stared in fear at you and Papyrus. He shifted nervously. 

“YOU’D THINK THEY HAD NEVER SEEN A MONSTER BEFORE.” He smiled, but only barely.  
The maitre’d shook slightly as he spoke to you and avoided acknowledging Papyrus at all. You couldn’t really understand what he was saying, but you noticed him constantly looking at you then at the front door.

You frowned and scoffed. 

“Don’t know what you’re saying but fuck you. This place looked sucky, anyway. Let’s blow this dump.” You grabbed Papyrus’s hand and stalked outside. 

You fumed outside while Papyrus caressed your hand. You had no idea why you were this angry. Sure you were upset about the situation, but some sort of all-encompassing rage was boiling in you and you hadn’t the foggiest idea why. You wanted to punch someone honestly.

Papyrus kissed your hand and smiled at you. “THERE’S NO USE IN LETTING THEM HAVE SATISFACTION IN RILING US UP NOW IS THERE? LET’S JUST GO BACK TO THE HOTEL, THERE WAS THAT RESTAURANT METTATON TOLD US ABOUT THERE! I’M SURE SINCE THEY KNOW WE’LL BE GOING, IT WILL BE MUCH BETTER.”

You smiled back at him and took a deep breath. Leave it to Papyrus to be the calm and collected one on this trip. _‘Well, weirder things have happened.’_ After getting lost a couple of times, you eventually made it back. 

“Alright, ugh, finally. Let’s get something to eat before I starve and die.” 

Papyrus stared at you worriedly. 

“Kidding, Paps. Only kidding!” You kissed his cheekbone and headed inside. Your reception was almost the polar opposite than the previous restaurant. Upon seeing you the maitre’d all but flung himself at you. You two were ushered to a booth towards the back of the restaurant, it was perfectly secluded. 

You two ordered your food and opted to just drink water this time. Papyrus ordered one big plate of spaghetti for you two to share. You secretly hoped that you two would do that thing from that dog movie and accidentally kiss, but alas, it was not meant to be. 

Sometime towards the end of your lunchtime excursion, you felt a very sharp pain in your chest. As though someone was stabbing you. You clutched at your clothes and took a deep breath. Papyrus looked at you worriedly. 

“ARE YOU ALRIGHT???” Couldn't he sense your pain? You were more than confused, but you couldn’t respond as the pain grew exponentially. You let an anguished groan slip from you. “D-DARLING?” He stood and scooped you into his arms. “LET’S GET TO A HOSPITAL.” 

He urgently hailed a restaurant-goer that just so happened to be fluent in both English and Italian and asked them where exactly the nearest hospital was. The person was nice enough to bring their date with them and direct Papyrus to the hospital, they introduced themselves as Antonio and Rosa. They were apparently huge fans of you and Papyrus and they wanted to help. Once inside he strode to the front desk. 

“I THINK SHE’S DYING!!! WHERE ARE THE DOCTORS???”

Antonio spoke to the woman quickly in Italian. The woman nodded the pressed some buttons on the big phone on her desk. You howled at another stab to your soul. Within moments, a nurse arrived and looked quizzically between you, Papyrus, and the nurse. 

“OH, THANK GOODNESS.” He handed you to the nurse, who barely had time to catch you. “PLEASE… PLEASE HELP HER.” 

The nurse paid no attention to him as you continued what felt like dying. 

The two humans and Papyrus followed the nurse to the Emergency Care Unit before being told to stay in the waiting area. The poor skeleton was beside himself with worry. He needed a second doctor’s opinion, he just couldn’t shake the feeling that something bad was happening. He called Undyne, she’d probably know where Alphys was and could help him. 

Undyne’s voice boomed through the receiver. “Hey, nerd! What’s up!” 

Papyrus related all that had happened in a panic. “WE WERE JUST OUT TO DINNER WHEN SUDDENLY OUT OF NOWHERE SHE STARTED FEELING SO MUCH PAIN! AND IT JUST KEEPS GETTING WORSE AND WORSE AND I THINK I CAUSED IT AND I JUST HOPE SHE’S OKAY AND-”

Undyne cut him off. “Dude! Slow down!” She sighed, “I understand that you’re nervous, I mean I’d be nervous if this were happening to Alphys. Want me to give you her number so you can call her about this? She’s super smart about human AND monster stuff so she’d be tons of help!”

He nodded and sniffled. “YES PLEASE! I’LL CALL HER IF I NEED TO. THANK YOU, UNDYNE.” 

Undyne chuckled. “Good! And keep me posted about how the human nerd is doing!” With that, she hung up and left Papyrus to his own devices. A handful of minutes passed before another nurse began speaking to Papyrus. He looked to Antonio and Rosa who began translating for him. Apparently, she was perfectly fine physiologically speaking. She wasn’t coding or anything, vitals were all normal in fact. The only problem was that she seemed to be “diaphoretic”, whatever that meant. You were free to go, despite your chest still throbbing in pain. It was less severe now, you could groan out a sentence. 

Papyrus thanked Antonio and Rosa and apologized for ruining their date. The two laughed it off, said they’d hate to see their favorite celebrity couple end in tragedy. Papyrus carried you back to the hotel and tucked you into the bed. You fell asleep almost instantly when your body landed on the soft mattress. 

On your way back, Undyne texted Alphys’s number to Papyrus. He had been itching to call since all this started. 

A stuttering voice answered ever so softly. “He-Hello?”

“DOCTOR ALPHYS, THANK GOODNESS!!! I NEED YOUR HELP, I THINK MY HUMAN IS DEATHLY ILL.” 

Alphys jumped and held her phone at arm's length as Papyrus screamed. Undyne was right, he was worried. “So wh-what’s the problem? A-Are they h-h-hurt? I-Is their soul okay?”

Papyrus hadn’t had the chance to check what with having to rush you around everywhere. “I HAVEN’T EXACTLY HAD THE CHANCE TO LOOK.” He didn’t feel comfortable pulling it out, but as it was you were incapacitated. Ever so gently, he coaxed your soul out and gasped. _‘THAT DOESN’T LOOK RIGHT AT ALL’_ Papyrus felt like he was about to faint. 

Alphys was growing more and more worried by the second. This long of a silence during ANY conversation with Papyrus had to mean bad news. “Pa-Papyrus? Is everything o-okay?”

“DOCTOR ALPHYS… I THINK I AM THE REASON FOR HER SUFFERING!!! I-I GAVE HER A SOUL CYST!!!” Papyrus sounded distraught and so very guilty. He embarrassedly recounted your night of soul passion with him and the white splotch that appeared this morning. Now that splotch had doubled in size and was bulging out of your soul.

Alphys was silent during his story, writing things down and cross-referencing known monster illnesses until she froze and smacked her head. Duh. “Y-Y-You said your s-souls fused?” 

Papyrus nodded and smoothed your hair while you slept. “YES. I MAY HAVE BEEN CARRYING A DISEASE OF SOME SORT? MAYBE???”

Alphys couldn’t help but snicker. Undyne was going to flip out when she heard about this later. “We-Well, they aren’t sick a-at all. I-In fact, they’d probably s-super healthy if all th-this is happening! I-If I’m interpreting a-all the stuff you to-told me right, I think your human is, u-um, with ch-child?”

Papyrus had to stop and process a for a moment. With child? What did that… _‘OH.’_ “THEY’RE PREGNANT???” 

Alphys nearly jumped out of her skin at the sudden exclamation. “C-Congratulations!” She squeaked happily. “I-I b-bet they’ll be so ha-happy!” 

Papyrus was still in shock. “I-I’M SURE THEY WILL.” He looked at your sleeping face in wonder. Pregnant? How? He had more questions than happy feelings at the moment, but he was sure your enthusiasm would perk him up. “THANK YOU FOR AIDING ME IN MY TIME OF NEED, DOCTOR ALPHYS!” He smiled nervously. “ALSO, PLEASE DON’T TELL UNDYNE. SHE MIGHT JUMP THROUGH OUR WINDOW AND GIVE ME A CONGRATULATIONS NOOGIE.”

Alphys giggled. Yeah, that was something she’d do. “G-Good luck! O-Oh and be s-safe! Y-You should follow up with m-me about the b-baby.” She backtracked a moment. “N-Not that you have to!! I-I-It was just a suggestion and I th-thought that you’d w-want m-me to give you know check ups!!” 

“DO NOT WORRY! I WOULD RATHER A FRIEND HELP US ALONG THAN ANYONE ELSE! NYEH HEH HEH!! I WILL KEEP YOU POSTED!” 

The two monsters gave their goodbyes and hung up. He looked at your soul hovering above your chest in awe. That little bump was a tiny soul, was it? No wonder you were screaming so much, that color splotch was trying to push out of your soul. Papyrus was sure that was absolutely excruciating. Your soul faded back into your chest and you turned in the bed, probably in the middle of a fitful dream. Your husband sighed and smiled. Life seemed to be getting better and better for the two of you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when I said I wouldn't take that long with the next chapter. I meant I'd take even longer.  
> Also, I am aware that neither hospitals nor gondola rides work like that but, for the plot convenience, sacrifices had to be made!
> 
> Glad to be back, at least for now!


	6. *Milk Is One Of The Best Sources Of Calcium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and your skeleton take a much-needed rest day after your mysterious health problem.

You woke in a bleary haze, almost like you’d taken one too many shots of whiskey. Your hotel room was pitch black save for the glow of Venice coming from your balcony. Why in the hell were you up this late? You grabbed your phone and checked the time. 2:30 AM… _‘Well isn’t that just peachy?’_ Papyrus was snuggled around your waist very obviously asleep. He nuzzled your abdomen and muttered something incoherent. You watched him dream for a while and stroked his skull. 

Eventually, you wiggled out of his surprisingly lax grasp and walked into the kitchen for a glass of water. You stretched as you felt your way in the darkness to the kitchen. It was quite a feat not tripping over anything and waking Papyrus up, but you managed it somehow. Once silently sipping your prize, your thoughts wandered to the previous day. That sharp pain from yesterday was nothing more than a dull throb now and it felt lower in your chest than before. You wondered what the fuck had happened after that first initial wave of pain. You were so distracted by it that you didn’t really remember much after the initial feeling. You knew you went somewhere with Papyrus, then he wasn’t with you, then you were back home. You sighed and rubbed your temples, the last thing you needed were health issues right now. 

You sighed, that was a problem for future you. Present you was gonna have a nice long soak in the bath. Maybe light some candles, crack a bottle of wine, have a nice silent treat. You tiptoed into the bathroom and began to undress and run the water. An aromatic mint, rosemary scent filled the room. You already felt more relaxed. After lighting a few candles, you examined your little “meditation area” and you had to say, it looked tranquil as fuck. Papyrus would’ve probably loved to join you. At the thought of his excitement when you two bathed together, your soul twinged, as did that odd pain in your chest. You stood in front of the mirror for the moment, slowly summoning your soul. Your eyes widened in fear at what you saw. 

Papyrus was violently shaken awake. His magic flared to life as he summoned a bone attack, only to stare back into your fearful gaze. 

“DARLING? ARE YOU OKAY?” He pulled you into a hug. “WHY ARE YOU UP SO LATE???”

You shrugged. “I just woke up for no reason. Probably because I fell asleep at, like, one in the afternoon. But that’s not why I woke you up! You gotta see this!!” You struggled in his loving grasp. “Let me go so you can see it!! This is an _emergency_ , Pap!” 

Papyrus quickly dropped you from his embrace, the worry was very deeply etched in his stare. 

You shoved your soul into Papyrus’s hands and looked back at Papyrus. His expression… well, it wasn’t what you were expecting. His sockets may as well have had sparkles in them and his grin was wider than you’d ever seen it. He looked like a kid on Christmas morning. There was some glowing growth on your soul that _wasn’t there before_! The growth was extremely prominent, like the hemisphere of a ball floating above the surface of a pool. Why did he look so damn happy about it? 

“OH, THIS IS GOOD I THINK??? IT’S BIGGER THAN YESTERDAY!!” He looked to your confused and perturbed face. “OH! I HAD NO TIME TO EXPLAIN THIS TO YOU, SEEING AS YOU WERE ASLEEP AND ALL.” He blushed a little. “YOU MAY WANT TO SIT DOWN FOR THIS.” You sat next to him and slid your hand onto his. “I SUPPOSE I MUST START FROM THE BEGINNING. WHEN YOU FIRST COLLAPSED IN PAIN AT THE RESTAURANT, TWO NICE HUMANS AND I RUSHED YOU TO A HOSPITAL, BUT APPARENTLY, YOU WERE FINE.” 

That explained why you remembered being somewhere else without Papyrus. 

“IN MY WORRY, AS A GOOD HUSBAND WOULD, I CALLED UNDYNE WHO PATCHED ME THROUGH TO DOCTOR ALPHYS AND GAVE ME SOME VERY GOOD ADVICE. I CARRIED YOU BACK TO THE HOTEL, CALLED DOCTOR ALPHYS, AND TOLD HER WHAT HAPPENED. SHE TOLD ME TO CHECK YOUR SOUL, WHICH IN MY PANIC, I HADN’T EVEN THOUGHT OF DOING!!” He kissed your forehead. “I’M SORRY ABOUT THAT. REGARDLESS, REMEMBER THAT WHITE SPOT ON YOUR SOUL? THAT WAS ACTUALLY A DEVELOPING SOUL PUSHING OUT OF YOU!!”

You interjected, trying to process what he was saying. “How’d you check my soul if I was asleep yesterday?” 

Papyrus grinned proudly. “MONSTERS HAVE THE INNATE ABILITY TO SUMMON FORTH OTHER’S SOULS. THOUGH, MOST OF THE TIME IT’S USED FOR BATTLING PURPOSES.” 

You nodded. “Makes sense. Soooo developing soul? I don’t exactly follow what that means, sugar bones.”

Papyrus grabbed your hands, you noticed little pricks of marmalade tears at the corners of his sockets. “W-WE’RE GOING TO BE PARENTS!” He hugged you tightly. “YOU’RE PREGNANT!!!” 

All your thoughts ground to a halt. Pregnant? You spoke slowly. “So that bump was... “

Papyrus kissed your cheek. “OUR CHILD!”

“And my pain was... ?” You still were in shock. 

“PROBABLY OUR CHILD’S SOUL SEPARATING FROM YOURS!”

You leaned back on the bed and covered your face with your arms. “I’m gonna have a skeleton baby.“ 

Papyrus wasn’t expecting such a stunted reaction from you. “ARE YOU OKAY, HONEY BUNCH?” He gently removed your arms to reveal tears streaming down your cheeks and the biggest, dopiest grin. You looked up at him and sniffled. 

“I’m perfectly okay, I’ve never been happier!” You wiped your eyes. “I honestly just kind of want to know _how_ this happened.” You laughed softly. 

Papyrus pulled you into an embrace. “I WOULD HAZARD THAT OUR TALK ABOUT CHILDREN BEFORE THAT PASSIONATE LOVEMAKING COERCED US TO INADVERTENTLY CONSENT TO HAVE CHILDREN.” He held your face between his hands. “I-IS ALL OF THIS OKAY WITH YOU? YOU’RE OKAY WITH A CHILD?”

You nodded. “I’m just surprised I guess, and a little relieved. I thought having a kid with you was just a silly daydream.” You gave a bitter chuckle. “Not like we’re too similar in the physiological department. I’m… I’m so glad.” You kissed his smile. “I just hope our little baby bones can handle such a great dad.”

Papyrus swelled with relief and pride. “NYEH HEH HEH!! OF COURSE, THEY WILL! WITH PARENTS LIKE US THEY COULD HANDLE ANYTHING.” 

You took a couple of deep breaths and smiled. “Should we wait to tell people? I can only imagine the backlash from this kind of thing. I mean I don’t know how monster pregnancies work, but I can try to hide it as long as possible.” You remembered how people reacted to your relationship. Before you had desensitized your campus to Papyrus’s constant presence, people were downright hateful. They abused both you and Papyrus just for loving each other, you had no idea how people would react to a human-monster hybrid baby, or how far that new hatred would spread. 

Papyrus sighed sadly. “I AGREE. IT COULD BE DANGEROUS TO TELL ANYONE. BUT I DON’T KNOW IF WE’LL BE ABLE TO HIDE THIS FOREVER. I’M SURE JUST WITHIN OUR FRIEND CIRCLE WILL BE SAFE ENOUGH!” 

“What should we name them?” You summoned your soul and squinted at the bump.

Papyrus chuckled and gazed at the bump as well. “HMMM. SOMETHING STRONG, THIS CHILD IS BOUND TO HAVE THE STRENGTH OF A THOUSAND SKELETONS.”

You snickered at that. Papyrus was always so humble. “I’ll look up some fonts and run the names by you.” 

“FONTS???” He shrugged. He didn’t exactly know what a font had to do with skeleton names, but he assumed you knew best. 

You kissed the little bump, Papyrus following suit. “You’re gonna have such a wicked cool family, little one.” Your soul slowly faded back into your chest and you sighed. You’d been holding tension you didn’t know you had. “Care to join me in the bath? I could use a breather after all that news.”

Papyrus stood and walked back with you to the bathroom. By this time the sun was rising, casting pink hues into the tub. It all complimented the glow made by the candles. You two settled into the tub in silence and watched the light glittering off of the canals. You sipped some wine, Papyrus took it upon himself to massage some of the tightness out of your back. By the time the sun rose, you and Papyrus had fallen asleep in the tub. 

When you two awoke the bathwater was lukewarm and the candles were practically melted down to stumps. The sun burned high in the sky. Both of you carefully exited the tub and dried each other off.

You two dressed in comfortable clothes and laid back in bed. 

“You know if Sans caught you being this lazy I think he’d actually cry tears of joy.” 

If Papyrus had eyes, he’d be rolling them. “WE BOTH HAVE BEEN THROUGH A LOT THESE PAST TWO DAYS. WE DESERVE A LAZY DAY TO RELAX.” He paused for a moment and glanced his phone. “SPEAKING OF SANS, WE SHOULD TELL HIM AS SOON AS WE GET BACK.” 

You cringed. How could you have forgotten just how much the skeleton had hated you those few years ago. A slightly unplanned pregnancy could bring that back to at least square two, if not square one. “I think that would be best. Not looking forward to it though, I don’t want him to not like me again. That sucked.” 

“I WON’T ALLOW IT THIS TIME AROUND! SANS WILL BE AN UNCLE AND HE WILL LIKE IT WHETHER HE WANTS TO OR NOT!!!” He had the cutest pout on his face. 

“Damn right he will. He’ll probably spoil the little thing once he’s done throwing his inevitable hissy fit.” You two laughed at the mental image of Sans going overboard and cooing over your little one.

All jokes aside, you weren’t sure about the feasibility of raising a child where you were currently. Especially since there was still schooling you still wanted to go through. Years and years of schooling. Not to mention Papyrus’s dream of owning a restaurant. You hoped you’d be able to support your child despite any future plans. You’d also need to move out of your apartment building and get more space for you little one, or god forbid little ones, too. Then you’d have to enroll them in school and watch out for kidnappers and murderers and racists… Your breathing was getting shallower and shallower by the millisecond. This was a _hell_ of a lot of planning that you didn’t even think of doing, now you didn’t know how much time you even had to get something done!

Papyrus felt your nervousness and kissed you softly. “BREATHE WITH ME, MY DARLING. IN AND OUT WITH ME OKAY?” 

You locked your eyes onto his inky black sockets and breathed in time with him. You felt your nervousness slowly cresting and pulling back, leaving nothing but a tired, dulled sort of anxiety. 

“Thank you, baby.” You smiled. “Whaddya say I order room service and get us some food? We can have, uh,” You checked your phone for the time. Yeesh, it was already 3:30 PM. “We can have a late lunch on the balcony together.” 

Papyrus nodded and released you. In one of the drawers of your nightstand, there was an Italian to English dictionary someone left behind. With a little butchering of words, you managed to order spaghetti up to your room and a jug of milk. It only took a few minutes your food arrive and the room service person was sure to bow and grovel, probably by the order of Mettaton. You brought the food and drink out to the balcony where there was a table surrounded by potted plants. Papyrus was admiring some flowers when you walked over. 

“I SEE YOU ASKED FOR MILK! EXCELLENT SOURCE OF CALCIUM FOR SKELETONS AND SKELETON CHILDREN.” 

You chuckled and mused about that for a bit. “You think if I dunked my soul in milk the baby would get stronger?” 

Papyrus hummed. “I… ACTUALLY I’M NOT SURE. PERHAPS WE SHOULD CALL MY BROTHER AND TELL HIM NOW?? I’M SURE HE KNOWS HOW TO CARE FOR SKELETON CHILDREN BETTER THAN ANYONE!! AND WE COULD RUN THIS BY DOCTOR ALPHYS TOO.”

Papyrus pulled his phone from his pocket and steeled himself. He’d never tell you, but telling his brother life-altering things was so nerve wracking. And the Great Papyrus’s nerves were almost never wracked! His soul was hammering worse than when he confessed his love for you to his brother. You grabbed his hand from the other side of the table and gave him a thumbs up. The encouragement did wonders for your husband. He dialed the number and held his breath. It took a few rings but on the fourth one Sans picked up. 

“‘sup bro, having fun in italy with your little human?” 

Papyrus smiled at the sound of his brother's voice. “OH YES WE ARE HAVING A WONDERFUL TIME AND IT’S ONLY BEEN THREE DAYS!” 

Sans could hear that thousand watt smile on Papyrus’s face. “‘s good to hear, bro. so what’s the occasion for the call? you need something?” 

Papyrus readied himself. “I WAS ACTUALLY CALLING FOR SOME ADVICE ON… THINGS.”

“what things? do you need me to teach you italian, pap? because that’s _penne_ im _pasta_ ble at this point.” He chuckled and congratulated himself for his double pun. 

“SANS!! THIS IS SERIOUS!! MY WIFE IS PREGNANT AND I HAVE NO TIME FOR YOUR PUNS!!” He covered his mouth in surprise. He could’ve introduced the subject a little more delicately. 

“your what is what now, pap?” His joking tone had vanished entirely. 

“MY DARLING HUMAN IS PREGNANT!” He smiled wider every time he said it. “W-WE JUST FOUND OUT YESTERDAY, AND I WAS WONDERING IF YOU HAD ADVICE ABOUT SKELETON CHILDREN.” 

Sans covered his face with his hand, if he wasn’t at work right then he’d probably scream or punch something. But his brother needed support right now, he didn’t want a repeat of when he first met you. Papyrus and he were fighting non-stop, all because he couldn’t get his own head out of his proverbial ass and support Papyrus. This time would be different, sure he was still boiling mad, but he knew monster children could only be born out of the utmost consent. So if you two thought you were ready for a child, he was ready to be the best damn uncle he could be. 

“aww, congrats, pap. I’d be happy to help you in whatever way i can with this.”

Papyrus had a look of utmost shock on his face. “REALLY? YOU AREN’T GOING TO THREATEN MY WIFE AT ALL? PERHAPS CURSE MANKIND? STALK US WHILE WE’RE IN ITALY???” 

Sans sighed. Even if his brother probably didn’t mean to come off that way, he sounded very bitter about what happened before, which was understandable. Sans, in the past at least, was a veritable prick after all. 

“nah, none of that. the whole “overprotective brother” thing ain’t my schtick anymore.” He could feel shame crawling all over him. “an’ i’m still super sorry about all that. you go off and enjoy your honeymoon for now. i’ll probably talk your human’s ear off about skeleton kids when you get back.” He threw a shit eating grin, even though he knew Papyrus couldn't see it. “unless i’m on my break, of course.” 

Papyrus groaned exasperatedly. “YOU’RE PERPETUALLY ON BREAK, SANS!! BUT THANK YOU ANYWAYS. WE’LL SEND YOU A PICTURE LATER!”

Sans relished in his brother’s reaction. “i’ll be waiting for it, bro. see ya in a week.” 

Papyrus smiled fondly. “I LOVE YOU, BROTHER.” 

He ended the call and slumped into his chair. “THANK GOODNESS!!” 

You sipped your champagne glass of milk. “Was everything okay? It didn’t seem like he was too mad, like, at all.”

Papyrus nodded. “HE WASN’T UPSET AT ALL. HE EVEN SEEMED PROUD AND HAPPY??? IT WAS A PLEASANT SURPRISE!” 

You covered your mouth and snickered. “You mean a plea _sans_ surprise?” 

Papyrus screeched indignantly, saying he wouldn’t be surprised if that was Sans’s unholy pun baby inside you instead of his own. You were snorting and gasping for air you were laughing so hard. Your baby wasn’t even born yet, but they were already bringing so much good into your life. You knew you were going to get through whatever the hell this pregnancy threw at you, and you were going to do it with the skeleton of our dreams and your big monster family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternatively titled "Sans graduates from dick face status to good brother status". 
> 
> If you guys want to see them do more vacation-y things, or some sexy times, or just want me to squeeze more fluffy pregnancy stuff, you can comment it down below and I'll fit it where I can! Suggestions and comments keep me motivated!


End file.
